Congratulations to Tallulah on her win. A flower for ya ... Hey, drop me an e-mail some time --we can do a photoshoot! ;)

Posted by the 520 gang at 01:35 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

Posted by the 520 gang at 10:21 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

A friend kindly photographed me in action at a recent rapier practice.








Anybody out there interested in learning to rapier fight? The SCA holds weekly rapier practices at a local park. Drop me a comment if you want to learn more.

Posted by the 520 gang at 04:07 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Most of my Saturday was spent at Cumberland Mountain State Park, rapier fighting with swordsmen (and women) from as far away as Nashville. It was good stuff. I'm quite sore.

While there, I authorized in rapier and a few other weapon combinations. I can now legally compete at a tournament level. W00t!

That evening, after my inconclusive battle with Strapping Young Lad, I ended up at the home of a friend of a former, um, acquaintance, playing Dread Pirates!

Posted by the 520 gang at 03:58 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

From a photographer's perspective, the Preservation Pub on Market Square is always worth a visit. Good ambiance. Lotsa eye candy. You can also run into interesting people like Beauvais Lyons, curator of the Hokes Archive. Brilliant man. Ask him about centaurs.





Of course, spend too much time at the pub and you end up making 2 a.m. trips to Kroger to soothe the munchies.





Or you can just cheat and make cinnamon toast.

Posted by the 520 gang at 11:41 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Being a superhero has always been one of my more childlike fantasies, but I reckon a career as a supervillian suits me better --after all, I've got the hair for it.

As proof of my villianious deviousness, I've uncovered the secret identity of Strapping Young Lad! No, I'm not going to tell you the name of his mild-mannered alter ego. That would ruin my delighfully fiendish plan.

Actually, Young Straps volunteered the information in an inadvertant e-mail. We're both members of a local martial arts mailing list that he spammed with a plea for votes. My reply, of course, was that he'd have to be a lot more convincing to get my vote! ;)

I did rein in my villainous nature enough to not "reply all" and inform his readers that Straps had made a technical mistake and that all ballots should be marked "Thirteen". But it was a fun thought, nonetheless.

Now, to implement my brilliant plan of world domination!
Bwahahahahaha!

Posted by the 520 gang at 12:24 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

One of the truly neat places (do I lose cool points for using the word 'neat'?) in Knoxville is Ironwood Studios, the lair of artists John McGilvray and Preston Farabow, located in a battered old industrial site behind the Old Gray Cemetery. I've attended a couple of First Friday events in the space --evenings filled with food and alcohol, art and loud music, and some great conversations with random people.

Apparently, Ironwood Studios will host a Big Art Show on March 9, throwing open the doors for local artists to show their work. I've decided to take the plunge, by golly, so I've signed up and will now be busily running prints of my work during the next 10 days or so.

Wish me luck!

Posted by the 520 gang at 11:03 AM | Permalink | Comments (3)

Well, instead of just being a tease about my homemade chess pie, I decided to share ...










As for a recipe.

Posted by the 520 gang at 12:52 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

Sunday turned out to be a pretty good. The fun started with a three-hour-plus rapier practice. It had been three weeks since I had crossed swords with anyone, and I was jonesing!

Afterwards, I hosted a poetry gathering. Poems were recited. Beer was quaffed. Bean soup (lotsa garlic and rosemary) was slurped. The day ended in a nice, hot tub of bathwater,
eating some of my homemade chess pie and talking poetry with a lady friend.

Ah, the simple pleasures of life ...

Posted by the 520 gang at 10:53 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

Since we're the only two males left blogging, I'm calling you out. It would be hard to arm wrestle via blog, but we could duke it out via beefcake shots for the prime voting demographic.

Posted by the 520 gang at 11:40 AM | Permalink | Comments (3)

I drove up to Adult World, a large and tacky sex shop out in the middle of nowhere. (Why? Well, I was comparing prices for a pair of handcuffs. You asked.)

Adult World itself was very underwhelming, but the scenery was something else entirely. Next door, someone had erected a vast cross out of sheet metal. It made quite a contrast with the sex shop. I wish I had a wide enough lens to capture the full view.

Posted by the 520 gang at 11:14 AM | Permalink | Comments (2)

It's almost March -- the crocuses are blooming and the sap is rising.

Damn, I need a date.

Posted by the 520 gang at 11:09 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Hey, Tahlulah -- you have to try the tostados with ceviche de camarones at Senor Taco. It's freaking good! ;)

Posted by the 520 gang at 10:22 AM | Permalink | Comments (2)

Last night, your humble correspondent ended up at Sapphire to give a listen to Sara Schwabe (illustrious webmistress of Knoxville 520) and Her Yankee Jass Band. I thoroughly enjoyed myself (drinking a bit more than is my custom these days in the process).

Sara has a lovely voice (best described as "sultry") and the two musicians backing her are quite talented (as well as funny). She did a hell of a job on "Cabaret". Some impromptu dancing by members of the Knoxville Swing Dance Association added to the fun.

The only negative aspect of the evening involves the men's restroom at Sapphire. The automated soap dispenser doesn't squirt soap on your hands -- it, um, ejaculates. Really. The whole tube-thingie thrusts forward in a rather, um, organic manner when activated. I'm going to need therapy now.

(editor's note: said webmistress did not solicit mention in Thirteen's blog, but appreciates it nonetheless.)

Posted by the 520 gang at 03:20 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

13letters.castpost.com/17338.html

What song is this? ;)

My version is a bit gentler than the original. That's the only clue you get.

Posted by the 520 gang at 03:16 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

One advantage of being both a swordsman and a photographer is that I have interesting props to use during a photoshoot.



Personally, I prefer how my blade and gorget (it's throat armor, not bondage gear!) look on my friend Summer.

Posted by the 520 gang at 11:55 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

...Can bloody well *make* quiche and eat it, too.

Mushroom Quiche a la "Thirteen"

Preheat oven to 400F.

Throw in a bought pie crust (but not too hard). Let it bake for about 10 minutes.

Beat three eggs, imagining they are Republicans. Sprinkle enough thyme in to make it look speckled. Add way too much salt and black pepper. Add 3/4 cup of milk.

Sautee six ounces of sliced mushrooms in butter for approximately five minutes.

Take the pie crust out. Curse. Remember to use oven mitt next time.

Sloppily toss mushrooms in pie crust. Pour egg/milk mixture over everything and put it in oven (without spilling too much).

Bake for approximately 45 minutes. Enjoy!

Posted by the 520 gang at 10:48 AM | Permalink | Comments (3)

Spent the weekend about 110 miles and 500-or-so years away from Knoxvegas, attending Black Gryphon, a weekend event held by The Barony of Thor's Mountain, Knoxville's local chapter of the Society of Creative Anachronism.

I performed in two plays at the event: "The Hawk-Eyed Sentinel" and "The Wonder Show" by Miguel de Cervantes. I had a couple short parts --an egoistic governor and a scrappy little shoemaker-- in my inaugral venture into acting; Never thought I'd end up on stage, but it does suit my natural hamminess.



The SCA? Yes, we dress up like the Middle Ages and hit each other with blunt objects. No, I wouldn't advise teasing us about it. Never piss off anyone wearing armor and carrying a sword. That's the basis of chivalry, after all. Politeness matters in an armed society.



All 'Miniver Cheevy' snarkiness aside, the SCA is collection of people who do. There are people living in Knoxville who can make chainmail armor or cook a feast for 120 or sew beautiful Elizabethan gowns or make beautiful, ornate, and functional handicrafts. I admire them greatly.

The event was great. I didn't screw up any lines. I made new friends. I attended my first-ever feast. (I was defeated, in the end, by the sheer amount of food. The conversation was wonderful, too.)

And then there was a delightfully carnal meeting with a new friend on Saturday night ...

. . . but that's another story.

Posted by the 520 gang at 01:03 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Life in the shadows of Knoxvegas can be quite interesting.

Posted by the 520 gang at 10:49 AM | Permalink | Comments (5)

Looking through the window at the Miller Building, downtown Knoxville. I wonder if he still works there?

Posted by the 520 gang at 12:30 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

You heard me. Run, don't walk, to Sunday brunch at the
Market Square Kitchen, One Market Square. It's orgasmic.

Posted by the 520 gang at 11:21 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Spend some time at Temple, you'll notice that people fall into about three categories:

There are the people who do.



There are the people who want to be done to.



And the people who just watch.



Guess which two categories of people I respect? Watching is not doing, boys and girls. Think of that on football nights. ;)

Posted by the 520 gang at 03:52 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

This blog contest is supposed to be all about partying, but it's probably best that I tell ya'll up front that I won't be drinking. I have nothing against alcohol, but, hell, after last year, the last thing I need to do is become involved in field research into the worship of Dionysus.

My last really big drunk involved peach moonshine and dinner with a lesbian friend. No, it wasn't as fun as it might sound. That marked the low point in my then-burgeoning practice of using alcohol as a coping mechanism. I decided enough was enough and have only been drinking sporadically (and generally lightly) since.

So, just so ya'll know, I'm planning to remain clear-headed during my pursuit of debauchery (and $500).

As usual, the whole conflict ended up being worked out in a poem.

www.audioblogger.com/media/56101/409835.mp3

Thirst

Give me a beer, something god-damned and bitter
-- an emperor thirst needs slaking.
There is a parched desire within, a desire for blindness,
a desire to cleanse away all the maps. The territories
want their forgetting, after all.
So give me a beer, something god-damned and bitter
-- or give me of the Lethe, that backwoods
pisswater the dead keep raving about.
There's no rest here. Doors want their closing. Windows
grow weary for lack of shade. I don't desire such keenness.
Let the edges dull. Let me cultivate some rust.
So give me a beer, something god-damned and bitter
-- something that I can wear like cotton,
something to be wrapped in like last night's sheets.
Give that lovely oblivion. Let me sleep.

--"Thirteen", September 17, 2006

Posted by the 520 gang at 11:13 AM | Permalink | Comments (2)

One of my favorite "I don't have to be a parent tonight, so let's get dangerous" pasttimes in Knoxville is attending Temple, an alternative dance event, held on Saturdays at the Electric Ballroom. It can be a little like the boardwalk scene from "Lost Boys" played out with a cast drawn from the Island of Misfit Toys. I feel at home there. I'm one of the broken, myself.

The regulars make the event. As a rule, they're some of the nicest and most polite people I've met. For instance, my friend Bunny is a wonderful lady.



For a photographer, Temple is also the promised land. There's always something interesting to see.

Posted by the 520 gang at 11:11 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Ah, Valentine's Day.

Blargh. After mainly dating near-psychos for the past 10 years, I've soured on the idiocy involved. My policy is to treat whoever I'm dating well every day. So why stress over one stupid day?



On a much happier note, I found the first crocus of the year in my yard yesterday. It's always a special joy.



Rehearsal went well, I reckon, last night. Only choked on one line. The roughest part was the location -- the University Center at UTK (THE NIGHT OF THE UT VERSUS KENTUCKY BASKETBALL GAME). So, I parked up on Highland to avoid the mess and walked down --dressed as an approximation of a 16th Century Spanish gentleman. Got some odd looks for that. Nobody directly addressed my attire, except for the bum who asked me for money for a beer. "I like your suit," he said.

Tonight, I could go read some of my poetry at the Satyr's Asylum open mic at the World Grotto; however, I'm thinking that I probably need physical exercise instead. Maybe I can find an opportunity to cross swords with someone.

Speaking of poetry, here's a small taste of my work:

click me

Posted by the 520 gang at 11:01 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Ah, an auspicious day for embarking upon my new career of blog-whoring for the rapacious Knoxvegas audience. Call me 'Thirteen'. Why? It amuses me.

Well, I'm starting out the gate with a bit of a handicap --been home caring for a sick four-year-old, so I haven't been able to get into any documentable mischief for the Internet masses. But it's good day anyway. My son is feeling better. Coffee is brewing. Lambchops are humming a seductive little tune from a skillet on the stove. It's a nice moment. That's all you can ask from life.

At my age, though, I also know a few tricks about manufacturing entertainment when nothing else presents itself. It's all about inner resources, boys and girls. I'm a photographer, a writer, a swordsman, and a cook. There are plenty of opportunities for self-distraction in those categories.

Bored photographers take an awful lot of self-portraits:



I also admire pointy things (keep your mind out of the gutter):



Tonight, I'll be busy with dress rehearsal for a couple of short plays by Certvantes. It's my first acting experience (aside from, um, getting to know two or so actresses in the past year). That'll keep me out of trouble for this evening at least.

We'll see what tomorrow brings.

Posted by the 520 gang at 10:52 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)